


What's in a name

by goodboysweaterTM



Category: Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Angst, Canon Universe, F/M, It's all okay in the end though, Post-Star Wars: The Last Jedi, Reylo - Freeform, ben says rey once, rey says ben a lot, very appropriate use of the force
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-10
Updated: 2019-09-10
Packaged: 2020-10-13 20:41:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 863
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20588765
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/goodboysweaterTM/pseuds/goodboysweaterTM
Summary: Ben's name on her lips and Rey's name on his.





	What's in a name

_ Ben. _ Her plea echoes in his skull as he lies awake at night, exhausted and desperate for sleep. A dull, incessant ache that inexplicably spreads deeper and deeper into his chest as the days pass. There is no escape, not even in sleep. Her eyes, full of hurt and longing, are always there when he closes his, dancing and searing across the backs of his eyelids. This night, warm and breezy as it may be, is no different.

_ Ben.  _ She hears herself whisper into the barren desert of Jakku, the sand and sun warped by her unconcious. He stands in front of her, his face younger and scarless. He smiles, the action bringing a warmth to his face she’s never seen, and reaches his hand to connect with her cheek. There are a million sensations bursting from his fingertips: safety and strength and passion and purpose. Her world, made turbulent and unstable by conflict and struggles, slows and something begins to shift, at once disorienting and somehow also balancing. There is a moment of stillness, of safety, and then a swirling storm of sand and wind tear them apart, their connection lost. Only cold, aching emptiness is left in its place. In consciousness she remembers. She remembers how he gave her up for power, for control. As harsh reality hits her she thinks  _ just like my parents _ . 

“Ben.”

For a moment he thinks he is dreaming, for only there does she call to him. Her warm voice has no place in this desolate cell. But then he turns and she is there, standing behind the barred door, her hands gripping the lattice framework. Her fingertips are white with the effort. Suddenly he is looking into those same hurt and longing eyes and he realizes his mind could not do the flecks of gold in her eyes justice.

“Rey…”

His whisper should be lost in the sounds of battle. Blasters fire, people scream, explosions ignite yet all she can hear is his voice. And the thump of his slowing heartbeat. It clicks then as she turns her head to see his knees buckle below him. She is scrambling over bodies and wreckage and smoking flames to cross the distance to him that seems ever expanding.  _ No  _ she chants in disbelief in her head, or out loud, she can’t be sure. He is on his back when she reaches him, clutching his stomach where the blood is seeping. She throws herself to the ground beside him, frantically pressing her palms onto the wound. The blood is pouring into the red dirt beside him now, pooling and spreading at a speed she can’t comprehend. But he simply smiles at her. 

“I always knew you would be the death of me,” he murmurs. His chuckle turns into a cough.

Her attention snaps back to his face, handsome as ever even caked in ash and dirt and sweat. 

“Stop,” she pleads. “You’re not dying on me.”

“It’s okay,” he says. His shaky fingers coming to caress her check, wiping away tears she didn’t know were falling, “I wouldn’t have it any other way.” His eyes flutter as his hand moves to trace her hairline. 

“Well I would,” she asserts. Her hands grip his neck, comb through his hair, trace the scar running down his face.

“You don’t get to leave me. Not yet.” She can hear the tears in her voice now as it trembles. He traces her nose and her lips, his touch becoming lighter and lighter. Another smile, this time only reaching the corner of his mouth.

“Oh Rey,” he babbles. “And just when I had decided I would never leave your side again.”

“Ben. Stay with me. Look at me,” she cries.

“I’m always looking at you,” he wheezes. “Stars, you’re the only thing I see.” 

Her tears are falling so hard and fast she can hardly see. She wipes them away as quickly as she can, trying to clear her vision. Desperately trying to drink him in and remember every single detail.

“I can’t lose you too,” she sobs.

She shakes her head but he is already slipping away. The light in his eyes flickers.

“I lo…” he tries but the words are stuck in his throat.

“I know,” she assures. “I know,” she comforts, harsher this time. Neither of them were ever any good at saying it.

She leans over him, memorizing the feel of him in her arms. Their eyes connect and a million things pass between them. Fear and forgiveness and sorrow and hope. She feels his last breath as if it is her own and when his eyelids flutter close in finality, her arms give out from under her. She collapses into the crook of his neck and she is truly sobbing now, wailing and screaming with a fierceness she did not know she possessed. Something peculiar happens when she finally breaks. The force within her, glowing and swirling, rushes out from every pore in body, both curling mist and wailing wind. It surrounds Ben beneath her, cocooning him in warmth and radiant light. She takes no notice, pure agony has overtaken every nerve ending. 

He takes another shuddering breath.   
  


**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading! 
> 
> This is my first time posting anything I have written but I thought it was finally time to become a content contributor for my amazing reylo family. (I clearly still can't get over how many times Rey called him Ben in TLJ).
> 
> Hopefully more where this came from soon :)


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